So opinions are running the gamut from OMGZ GREAT to OMGZ YAY and y'all already know where I stand (YAY!!!!!), but let's take a minute to discover why.

Introducing, the StickyKeys Live Blog
f. FANT ASIA on IDOL 5/14/08


( Live Blog! )

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Fantasia is a niche artist, you either love her or you hate her and that's about it. Nina remarked that she ain't gettin' no new fans so she might as well cater the heck to the ones she has, and that's what she does.

I love her because WYSIWYG and anything less would not be FANTASIA

I love that she's so true to herself that if you try to put her in a box and she fails you have no one to blame but yourself.

I love that when you realize exactly who she is she can blow your mind away.

I love that she's comfortable with the show and with the judges to just go out there and give it her all.

I love that the Season 6 kids listened to her CD while they were on tour.

I love her because she too wants to make out with Ryan Seacrest. Sloppily.

I love her because while she's contempo r&b now, she has the kind of voice that can easily spin into clssic genres and ensure her longevity, and she can do it anytime she wants.

I love her. Simply. Her ghetto hot mess fire that ignites my ears and eyes. Her inability to be anything less than over the top and her rampant desire to never hit bottom.

Syesha tried to claim her, but I'm taking her back! She's MY idol, and I love her.

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I know officially he got TWoP in the divorce, but I had to take a peek:

Next up is Fantasia, singing...wow. You have to be very, very confident to get up and sing a song called "Bore Me." Particularly with Simon Cowell within 5000 yards of you, much less right there in your line of sight. Is this song title a hidden clue from the producers that Archuleta's got this in the bag? Or, wait, are the producers conspiring against him now? Every year it gets harder and harder to keep up. So Fantasia's painted her hair red, and not a single word she sings is decipherable in the slightest, and she borrowed all the beeps and snorts from Beyonce's "Work It Out," and as always it sounds like it must hurt a whole lot to sing like Fantasia, and ultimately? She's totally fantastic. And capital "I" Insane. Did she always know how to dance? This is awesome. Cut to Simon, mouth agape, struggling to comprehend. She has literally knocked Simon's brain clear across the room. He's finished. So am I. Wow.

And then? Just as Ryan's about to send it to commercial, she pretends to make out with Ryan. I vote we just declare Fantastia a Double American Idol and call this season a wash. Who's with me?

Ha! That Joer really gets it sometimes!

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( pics )

Flove Rob & Big, and of course I only notice them as they leave the air. Hopefully I can get the dvd hookup!

I've already been moody and bloated and gassy as crap. Today a letter and a paid account token made me cry. I have never been hornier in all my life.

God I love being a woman.

When there's no time to write. Spam with pics.

Got a Tumblr. But I can't figure out how to simply add a horizontal line between entries. And the guy who was hosting the layout went belly up. So it looks crazy, but I don't care right now cause it's totes cute.

like so:

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( Moar plees )

Him: So I'm trying to confirm my soc and it's telling me that I'm not me.

Me: Yeah, probably cause your name is John Smith.

Him: It's John Charles Smith.

Me: If there are duplicates, it won't immediately match up. I'm sure there are several John Charles Smith's.

Him: But none like me.

Me: This is true, I'm sure.

Him: I have impeccable credit.

Me: I'm sure you do, your name is still John Smith.

Him: What do I have to do to confirm my SSN?

Me: Change your name to Tawonda?

Him: What? Really?

Me: No, but it would be fun, right? Actually you can just fax us some documentation.

Him: Can you imagine what my mother would say, if I changed my name to Tawonda?

Me: Well I'm sure after meeting Terry, your domestic partner of 13 years, she's already assumed.

Him: Tawonda is a fabulous name.

Me: It is, almost as good as John Smith.

Him: Almost. John Smith is pretty wonderful.

Me: Pocahontas loved it.

Him: Ha! Such a hussy she was! According to the Disney remakes.

Me: I know! You know, if I were able to, I'd email you in the real world.

Him: If you were able to, I'd read it.


Spirits are good, but lack of time is evident. Love y'all.

Okay, okay, I know. It's a lot of Danny going on and I know I created the fan comm just so I wouldn't bog you beautiful babies down, however this:



Is worth it. I know you're thinking "We've seen this!" but go past the singing and watch the rest. WATCH THE RAP! WATCH THE MANIC DANNYNESS! DO IT B*TCH! SAY SOMETHIN'! He's got like the worst case of ADD ever, and I love it.


Let's sit back and ruminate while young La Noriega drops his knowledge:

"Got my
Doo-rag.
Cause I'm a motherf*ckin' f@g.

And I don't give a sh*t what you have to say.
Yeah.
I'm gay.

But you eat hay for dinner.
(why?)
Cause you look like a horse.
B*tch.

Tryin' to talk sh*t to me
While (whilst) I get down
Like this

B*tch.

Do something.
(Selah)

A bit frantic (frenetic?) at the end, but still full of Love, Valour, and (com)Passion.

Lovely La Noriega
Out!

via taxcha



Okay, yeah, I get it... *smh*









<3!

So y'all have heard about Sarah Silverman and Matt Damon, right?

If not, check this:

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Well Jimmy has a little surprise for Sarah...

Who bought you that Runza?
My baby daddy!

"...were stopping by our room asking what we were eating! Runza made my hosppital stay more enjoyable. The only thing better than a Runza Sandwich and fries are my beautiful baby girls."

--Jennifer
Elkhorn, Ne


Food poisoning is the perfect gift

"Our daughter attends college in Texas. She loves cheese Runzas, but there are none to be found down south. On our drive down to see her for Christmas vacation, we stopped at the last Runza in southern NE and bought her two cheese Runzas. Upon arrival in Texas, we found we had brought her the best Christmas

gift of all: RUNZAS!"

--Barbara
Henderson, Ne


Uphill both ways?

"When I was a little girl, I remember the times my mom would take me to Runza on winter days. She would let me order two Runza Sandwiches and onion rings. We would sit and watch the snow falling ourside. It was magical... and yummy too!!"

--Julie
Emporia, KS

aka Ode to Sophie Treadmill

Woman Sues Best Buy for $54 Mil Over Lost Laptop

I hope she gets PAID. I've heard horror stories of lost, damaged, or erased laptops and Best Buy's and HP's chintzy customer service when dealing with them. It's about time someone did something to bring some national attention to the matter. Good for her.

And when you get that money Raelyn, hook a sista up!

See anything familiar?

Holla!




Get it girl!  ANTM CYCLE !0 

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Additionally:  My nephew and I spit caps

Him:  Yo Mama is so dumb she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl!

Me:  Yo Mama is so old, she got Jesus in her yearbook!

Him:  Yo mama is so fat, she uses Mexico as her tanning bed!

Me:  Yo mama is so black, when she walks into the kitchen, the roaches just stay there!

Him:  What?

Me:  HAHAHAHAAAAAAA!!!

Him:  OMG!  Why are you laughing like that!

Me:  Hee!  Oh Lawd, let me call Nina!

Him:  HA!! 

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Weezie's on the prowl...

Lil’ Wayne and Zac Efron Scandal

Tuesday, December 18th, 2007

>

The Orange County Weekly recently talked with Lil’ Wayne about his collabo with Zac Efron on the latest installment of the High School Musical franchise, titled *High School Musical 2: Non-Stop Dance Party *and purchasing a new home in Miami Beach.

But the shocking part is during the interview, Zac Efron, the star of ‘High School Musical’ walked out of a side room, said, “What’s up, my nigga?” and planted a full kiss on Lil’ Wayne’s lips!! The writer said the 20-year-old brunette heartthrob is crashing in Wayne’s guest room while the two work on their High School Musical songs together.

Lil’ Wayne is quoted as saying, “Yup, I had to do that. I’m trying to reach those suburban white kids like Kanye did.” That’s the way to do it if you want all the mainstream blogs to write about you Wayne. By the way, did anyone get a picture of the kiss?

Thank you Miss KJ!  This story is so perfect I don't care if it's true or not.  This story is such that if it wasn't true, I imagine the following happening:

Zac:  Oh my God, did you read that article?  That's... I mean, that's crazy, right?

Weezie:  Yo man, don't sweat that ish, them muvfvkkers don't know shee-it bout how we do.  You my new brother from another mother, naw mean?  That's blood son, that's love, my true brother.

Zac (steps close):  Really?  That's awesome, and so deep.  Vanessa never gets that deep with me.

Weezie:  That's cause Nessa Baby ain't your man, baby.  She ain't your brother.  She can't hold you like I can.

Zac (steps closer):  Hold me?

Weezie (bounces):  Yeah son, when the chips are down you got to hold this nigga, and I got to hold you, cause you my brother now, that's blood, that's life!

Zac (steps close):  So like, you know, whatever, right?  If I was all, "whassup my nigga!" and then stepped up to you like now, then-

Weezie:  Tha black is hott, the black is hott

Zac:  Bet on It!  Umm, that's... that's one of my songs.  The song I sing.  "Not gonna stop till I get-"  ahem, my shot.  Am I standing too close to you?

Weezie:  Boy you could stand in me and it wouldn't be close enough!  Cause we blood now, the blood is in our veins and in our soul, BIG WEEZIE!

Zac:  Yeah... totally, yeah.




That's right people, I wrote fanfic.  COUNT IT!

BF

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I slept on this site forever and now everyone won't shut up about it so I finally watched and while it was cute I wasn't wholly impressed by The Landlord vid. What I was happy to find was The Message was being broadcast there (one of Will's favorite vids is "How To Become A Black Republican" which is utter hilarity.

Anyhoo, I was just going to email this to AJ and Sophie, but I thought it was awesome enough for all. I love The Hills but mostly for the craptaculous drama and this season has it in double amounts. Mostly with Spencer and He!d! yes, but also with Adriana and Justin Bobby (who tried to play the "don't you know who I am?" card and was DENIED!).

This is a clip of the show, but acted out by James Franco and Mila Kunis and it's so dead on it's brilliant. Enjoy!

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HOLYCRAPHOLYCRAPHOLYCRAP!!! LITERALLY!! expatiates has probably already seen this, but if not leila82 and thegirliscrazy be sure to tell her about it!

HA!

As seen in specialty stores for $19.99. Personal massager delivers gentle vibration. Remove hand from silvery plating and massager automatically stops**.
• Simple one-touch function.
• Perfect for pressure points and relieving tension.
• Vibrates with just one touch.
On/off switch. Takes 1 AA battery (not included). Plastic. Imported. 5 3/4" H x 1" diam. 

**Don't it always? *smh*

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Was jonesing for a French Onion Burger and Fries sooo...

"...my sister showed up just in time with the Runzas! My wedding was perfect."

Heather - Oak Harbor, WA

"I grew up in Nebraska and Runza was a regular mealtime staple. When I moved to Denver to attend college and get married, the thing I missed most was those Runzas. I would talk about them at work and everyone would look at me like I was speaking a foreign language. One day, I talked my husband into driving all the way to Loveland, CO to get me lunch from Runza. After all the hyper I had given Runza, everyone in my office wanted Runzas too. My husband came back with boxes of Runzas and no one was disappointed!"

Christina - Aurora, CO

"I just had my first Runza and... what an experience it was. My wife and her family have eaten Runzas for years so I decided I would see what all the fuss was over. I bought my first Original Runza, took it home and had my first taste. It was love at first bite!!!"

Henry - North Platte, NE

Yes people, there's a precedent indeed.

I'm really just posting this to see if I can piss off the posters at lucasgrabeel.org. Those are some entitled heiffas! I think I'm a little jellus.

Anyhoow, this is also for Robert, Leila, and every other HSM head because we all know who the real club head in that group is.

And cameo by Zac Efron! Wii!



I'm especially interested in what Christo thinks about it. No reason, just wondering.

Don't play frogger on the highway. Come on y'all, I know the flare for the dramatic is high, and as you know I appreciate that on several levels. But as a motorist who only looks at the road as a way of getting from point A to point B, and not to catch up on my stories, KEEP YOUR DRAMA OFF THE HIGHWAY!



I would ran them over personally.

(shut up, you know I would have pulled over and tried to adopt them or some mess. PATRONIZE THIS! *grabs left tittie*)

ps. There's a really inappropriate joke in here concerning a Canadian Monk Seal, but it's a bit dated so I'll leave it alone. Ahem.

If you can't tell by the icon or the title, then you're probably a boy-man who doesn't want to read the following. Don't worry, I'll give you time to scoot.

So all of you Ladies and Gentleladies who are left here is one of the 8 wonderfully weird things that I'm required to espouse for that HOMEWRECKER WHO TAKES BATHS WITH OTHER GIRLS BUT CAN'T ANSWER THE PHONE SO WHEN YOU CALL YOU HEAR 4 BARS OF SEXUAL EFFING HEALING AND THEN SEXY SHANNON MESSAGE VOICE BEING ALL "HELLO MY NUBIAN GODDESS, I AM UNABLE TO BRUSH THE ROYAL TEETH TODAY BECAUSE I AM ON THE OTHER LINE TAKING BATHS WITH OTHER GIRLS!!!!!! Shannon!

Thanks for tagging me Shannon! (PHONE TEASE!!)

Ahem.

So anyhow, every month whilst surfing the crimson wave if you will (and you should) I get the unnnerving urge to write really bad menstrual musings and share them with you, my loyal readers. I even made a comm for it, but by the time I get around to designing the thing and then promoting it my period is done and I'm feelin' fine, BUT NOT SO THIS TIME! I'm in the midst and I have a half hour to kill so be prepared for verse about bloat, cramps, and those weird things that make you feel like your passing an eel that no one EVER TELLS YOU ABOUT IN SCHOOL aside from "slight discharge of lining" which, SLIGHT DISCHARGE MY EMPTY UTERUS! How about SLUG LIKE DROPPINGS THAT MAKE IT SO YOU CAN'T WALK RIGHT!!

Yes, I recognized I stepped out on a very weak AMIRITE OR AMIRITE?! limb just there in assuming that anyone else besides me has that issue and maybe I'm actually losing like, eggs, or jellified kidney stones, BUT TODAY IS THE DAY OF ME NOT CARING!

So anyhoo, first, a Haiku

Cascade:
Drip drop Drip drop Drip
Everything on the inside
Meets the world.


Sea Salt
I think that I shall never feel
a sensation so odd or quite surreal
as slimy, bloody, little clots
Bypass my tampon and head towards my socks


Cotton
OH ME!
OH MY!
I got a BLOT On
My COTT On
Pants.

No, not panties, as they say in Christenglandland, but instead my Pant (EEEEEEE!)s.
Wings have always (c) protected my draws
And yet the crotch of my pants suffers.
Selah.


Cramps
Wal-dol, Midol, Pam-per-in
I cling to you as you fight,
the battle with in.

My body it churns and it wrings itself out
acetaphetamin will come to my rescue
of this I have no doubt.

OUCH! That was a doozy!
OUCH! I feel like such a floozy!
OOH! I can't zip my pants!
GRR! I've got a mean case of the rants!

But Midol, My Wal-dol, My Pam-per-in
Even if it's purely psychological
You keep my sanity within..

Reach.



Maybe more soon. Hopefully not...

There's a precedent:

"Thank you for being great at all you do and for helping meet the love of my life... my wife!!!"
-Dan: Columbia, MO

"For my graduation party, I told my mom I didn't want anything else but Runza food served. She told me we were having sandwiches and cake instead. Disappointed I told her again to get Runza Sandwiches, but still no luck. A few days later a buddy and I were getting lunch at Runza when my mother walks in. I ducked so she wouldn't see me. I could hear here placing an order for Mini Runza Sandwiches! I couldn't believe it, how ironic!"
-Carrie: Scottsbluff, NE

"When I moved back here from Kansas City, MO I ate at Runza EVERYDAY for my first six days back. I loved and savored every bite realizing how much I missed Runza."
-Angie: La Vista, NE

"I can't wait to feast upon a couple of Swiss-cheese mushroom Runzas and the best onion rings IN THE WORLD!!! Thanks for a great product!"
-Phil: Huntington Beach, CA